Kind Of Down

Ok, so my dream didn't come true.

I didn't honestly expect it to, but you know how it is.

Everything is still stable with the boys and I, except my cervix isn't as long or relaxed as it was while on the medication. Thankfully, Dr. Jenkins said he expected that to be the case. Bummer part is, it makes it a little less likely that I'll get to go home next week, but that still depends on how things look next Thursday.

I am now down to one doctors appointment a week instead of two, and so I don't have another appointment until next Thursday when I reach 28 weeks. During that appointment, I'll be getting a fibronectin test. Fibronectin is a protein created when the sac disconnects from the uterine wall, which is a possible sign of labor. If I get a negative result, that means I'm not in any danger of going into labor in the follow two weeks or so. If it comes back positive....well, there's really no way to tell whether I might go into labor soon (several patients who get positive results don't go into labor for another month or so) but they'd keep me here in order to keep a better eye on me. Whether I can go home also depends on if our hospital in Baker can do fibronectin tests, so that I wouldn't have to go to Boise on a weekly basis.

So basically, next Thursday will determine a lot of things, but either way it sound like I'm on bedrest for the duration. I just hope I can come home. It's been pretty hard being away from home and Nathan for the past month and I still have a couple of months to go. I think a lot of people are assuming that I want to go home just because I'm homesick, which is partially true. But more than that...infinitely more than that...is me needing Nathan. I hate that we have to be apart and that he isn't getting to experience this pregnancy as much as most dads get to. And that he has to drive over here every weekend, in between working full 40 hour weeks. We need each other, and yet we're a full state apart. So no, really, as much as I'd love to see my house, that's not why I want to go home. I want to go home because Nathan is home.

So please be praying that the fibronectin test comes back negative and that Baker's hospital has the ability to do the test there.